It's hot in my room. But I don't want to sleep with the fan cause it makes me feel cold and alone. I shouldn't feel this way but I do. Everything reminds me of her and I can't help it. I wish this would just end. I don't need her but my mind and body thinks otherwise. I just need things to occupy my mind buy I'm running out things to do. I lay in my bed at night and just lie there for hours thinking about nothing. This used to be my favorite time of night and now it's something I don't want to even go through anymore. It's harder and harder every night cause I know your talking to someone else instead of me. I cant go through it anymore. Happy birthday to me.